Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Friends Don't Let Friends Mother Alone

Moms need friends. We need friends to vent to and tell us when it's time to be quiet and suck it up (I can't even type "shut-up" let alone say it). We need friends to stand along side in the tough times and take us out for a girls night in the good times. We need friends to share the mile markders with and cry with when the mark seems too high. Friends understand, listen, and encourage. They will talk recipies, breast feeding, poop in the bathtub (kid poop...do I really need to clarify?!), where to find the deal, and everything and anything in between. When I reflect on my journey as a mother, I'm amazed at how much of it is defined by my friends.

Reaching out to friends can take some courage. I was recently on fb and saw a post from a friend that is distanced from me in miles and years gone by. She was frustrated, hurt, and ready to hang the towel. I was thrilled to see how many people in her fb community reached out to her to offer a note of encouragement or some practical help. It made me feel good about the human race and it got me thinking about a phrase I recently heard, "Friends don't let friends mother alone". It's sassy and oh so true!

My girlfriends love me in ways that I couldn't live without and my heart is just bubbling over with gratitude and praise for them today. They are my sisters from another mister. I feel secure knowing that they are only a phone call away. If I'm having one of those days, they will swoop in with a hug, a play date, or anything else I need. They are a gift from God and I don't mean that in a trite, stitch it on a pillow way. They are tangible proof that I have a God who provides for my every need, even my need for freindshhip.

If you are feeling lonely in mothering, it's time to run up the flag for help. Deposit some time and words into your current friendships reminding your friends how much they mean to you. Ask people clearly for what you need....be bold. Plug yourself into a community that can support you like your church or a local mom's group. Six years ago, I signed up for a MOPS group that was operating out of my church. I found friends and mentor moms to build supportive and encouraging friendships with. Shameless plug: MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) is where I recently read that tag line, "Friends don't let friends mother alone". I also joined a Bible study that offered fantastic childcare to my kids while I was able to go deep in the word of God with other women who became bosom buddies.

So, I declare today as the day to give thanks for the friends you have and the day to search for teh friends that you need!

"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."
-Walter Winchell

2 comments:

the deKorne family said...

Great post!!! You are a wonderful friend to so many people! I feel blessed to kind of be one of them. :)

Sandy said...

Awesome post, Jennifer. Your words touch my heart.